That's the level of my stress right now. I figure I wouldn't be so stressed if I wasn't also part of the school play .. or if I wasn't the lead of the school play. I know other seniors or individuals are just as stressed as me but I'm being self-centered by thinking that I may be one of the most stressed. Let's review my list of what to be stressed about:
1 I never really did my senior project research paper, which means I don't even have a topic. My senior presentation is on April 28. That is um in two days. I have, technically, less than two days to find a topic that interests me, write a five-page research paper on it, then construct a PowerPoint, and finally, present the PowerPoint.
2 On the same day of my senior presentation is my physics test. Ms. Wolcott is a cruel, cruel woman.
I can't afford to do badly on the test, because it's the only class I'm in danger of not getting an A in. I must ace this test or get a really high B to ensure that my final grade will be an A. I wouldn't mind studying if I didn't have to finish a PowerPoint the same day.
3 Our school play is coming up much sooner than I expected or than I wished it was. April 30 is our opening night. I have to have my lines memorized by Monday. I don't really have a lot of time to do my senior presentation + study for Physics if I'm basically at school until 7 rehearsing. I have
a lot of lines. It's approximately a three-hour play and I have the lead female role. Did I mention that I have
A LOT of lines?! Yes. Stress x infinity.
4 Tomorrow I send in my SIR to whichever university I'm going to attend for the next four years of my life so I don't want to make a mistake. Billay told me this should be the least I have to worry about because they're all good schools. He makes a good point but I don't know why it's taking up a huge portion of my thinking space.
CAL or UCLA or USC? Bears or Bruins or Trojans?! UC or private? Close to home or far? SF or Hollywood glam? I don't know. I don't know!
5 I got asked to prom. Yessireebob. Now I have to worry about girly stuff: what dress will I wear, will I do my hair up or down, what shoes to wear, where to eat before, what to do after, what to do at the dance, etc. I, however and hopefully, will worry about that after April. I really do hate April. April is a bitch. Sorry April.
6 APs are coming up.
Why does it seems so rushed this year? It feels like all the teachers are beginning to prep only now. I remember last year prepping months ahead, squeezing in Saturday prep days too. I felt way more prepared last year than I do this year. I don't know. It just feels really really rushed. Like "Here you go! APs are only a week away. Let's get to it people!"
7 On top of all this stuff, I still have regular homework I have to finish on a daily basis. That I'm
so not keeping up with. Yes, I'm behind on some very important assignments. I also have other projects I need to do and other tests I probably will have. I'm just screwed.
Plain 'ol screwed. And I want to go out with a BANG! by getting straight As. IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE RIGHT NOW?! Is it obtainable? Can I do it with the absence of motivation, drive, focus, sleeep?!
8 Oh, and I had a fever from all the stress and lack of sleep compiled. I am
still sick. I cough maniacally and coughing out yucky shit. I sneeze, blow my noise, make noise. I cough a lot actually. I'm about to cough right now too I believe.
There you go. There is more, but I can't remember because my brain is kind of numb right now. You see why I'm so disheveled and cuckoo? Sigh* I'm ready to go kaboom~
*Excuse my horrible grammar. I'm kind of just thinking and typing .. maybe not even thinking properly.
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